Monday, August 23, 2021

Full Blue Moon in Aquarius Community Reading

wow, that's some kind of energy out there this weekend, huh?  I've got a jar of water out charging in the moonlight, and as we're also expecting some wind & rain from the hurricane in the Atlantic, it's gonna be one powerful elixir!  

 

set a jar of water out after sundown, and bring it in before sunrise to make moon water!

 

there was a full moon in Aquarius on July 23, so this lunation is closing that energy out - its all about changing into who we mean to become, which is by no means easy, but the release of pent up emotions will certainly be healing...hopefully of the past so we may move more freely into our futures.  that it's a blue moon only amplifies its power, giving us the courage and creative energy to help new inspirations for the collective take flight...release release release!  'we the collective' have never been more aware of our personal gifts, and the need to share them - take a look back and be proud of how far we've come!  we may find that dialing down any arrogance and judgement helps us to simply recognize our value, and polish ourselves to (near) perfection.  a little "know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em" energy!  notice what ignites your passions, and focus on lighting that fire...or alternatively, what scares you to death, and what helps you manage to keep steady and calm?  do we talk about it/use that motivation?  or do we keep it to ourselves so we can deep-dive in solitude?  who are we when no one's looking?  let's make sure to free ourselves of any old, outdated restrictions we're stuck in and grow into everything the collective needs us - and who we need ourselves - to be.  here's what we got:


image shows three cards from The Tarot of a Moon Garden - 9 of Staffs (reversed)/10 of Pentacles/The Hierophant, with a small feather and a string of beads, on a light cloth background.

9 of Staffs (reversed):  that chip on our shoulder is telling us that we haven't been learning from our past mistakes...it's the over-identification with struggle mentality that has us tending to fail at the finish.  focusing on our triumphs - honoring the challenges we've managed to turn into opportunities - can help shift our mindset from victim to victor.  we're So Close, we HAVE to keep going!  there's nothing to be gained from wasting energy being angry that life isn't fair; use it instead to recognize and correct an indefensible position...like creating our own drama and blaming it on others (we all do it, we just change the story to suit our purposes).  there's still a lot of work to do, so let's get after it!  and maybe ease up on the restrictions/boundaries a bit...we need to learn to compromise.

10 of Pentacles:  a long hard path to get to where everything we put work into will flourish; a permanence and satisfaction made all the sweeter for being shared with family.  our plan for the future - the solid foundation on which we support and care for our legacy.  so much abundance through a balance of emotional and physical work.  deep roots help generational abundance thrive.  can this energy feel stagnant, though?  boring?  does it need a good dose of conflict?  while a conventionally stable life feels safe and expansive, we may need to ask if we're doing what really matters to us.  remember to spend time pursuing our passions while enjoying the fruits of our labors.

The Hierophant:  following the path of knowledge and education through sacred institutions, embracing convention, following the process/rules.  a trusted mentor that helps align us with our core values, a symbol of the sacred, and spiritual awareness.  being ok with asking for what we need.  someone who can and will provide wisdom and guidance, or someone who is set in their ways. don't rock the boat.  taking part in a ceremony or ritual of your own creation.

 


 

if the message here is to 'get out of our own way' and stop creating drama that holds us back from working towards building a solid foundation for our future, then perhaps in this moment we need to learn how to do that through established practices and conventional collective wisdom.  this doesn't appear to be an opportune time to seek out groundbreaking new practices, or cutting-edge solutions - stick with the tried and true for success in this instance.  where are we failing, and why?  in what ways are we stepping on our own toes, and avoiding our deepest, most necessary work for the needs of the collective?  how can we best move forward together in ways that honor and uplift us all?  how much work have we done towards updating the 'collective wisdom' in our time, and can we do more?

I know I have a lot to think about in terms of how best to move forward with bringing my dreams to fruition, and 'following the established rules' is probably a great place to start, in my case.  as always, thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™


resources:

Light Witch Tarot Shop

The Hood Witch

Anima Mundi Herbals

Dr. Michael Lennox

210 42hz Aquarius full moon frequency

Saturday, August 14, 2021

Friday the 13th/Saturday the 14th Shabbat Community Reading

it feels like forever since I posted a community reading but I've been moving house, so between the packing up and looking for an apartment (again), and doing the actual lift & carry, I've been a bit absent to say the least.  here it is two weeks later, and I'm just starting to get back to my routines, as the whole process was emotionally, mentally, and very physically draining, and I've needed some serious recuperation time filled with relaxation and self-care.  not to mention all the astrology!  how have you all managed to navigate:  the Venus/Mars alignment, Chiron & Eris going retrograde, Midsummer, and the Lion's Gate portal energy?  it's been a roller-coaster ride of emotional turmoil for me and mine, and I'm looking forward to the gentle energy of the next full (blue) moon on the 22nd.

 

image I found on the internet that I couldn't find any info on ~
 

for today's community reading, I'm using the Tarot of a Moon Garden because the moon is obviously on my mind.  we're currently at a waxing crescent, but I'm feeling the pull to be more attuned to moon energy as the days get shorter, and we sink deeper into the dark half of the year.  I know it's a weird thing to think about while we're still engulfed in a heat wave in the US, with the annual wildfires burning on our western coast, but as the weather gets ever more extreme, I'm doing my best to tune in to how the Earth herself wants me to roll with the updates.  also with peri- or menopause, I'm not as aware of my own cycles, so am looking to the heavens for guidance and wisdom.  here's what we got:

 

image shows four cards from the Tarot of a Moon Garden - The Empress/The Chariot/2 of Pentacles/The Moon, on a pastel background with horizontal silver stripes, crowned by eucalyptus, a gold-tipped feather, driftwood, and a fairy jar.

 

wow, look at all that creative energy in motion!  I dropped one card while shuffling and set it aside, then drew the first three cards.  after looking them over and hearing their message, I turned over the 'jumper' card, and would you believe it was The Moon?  of course you would, because you believe in magic and synchronicity (and I posted a picture), and you know I smiled when I saw it and said, "of course."  so what is it saying?

The Empress - abundance, bounty, generative fertility, She is the Garden of Eden, an Earthly paradise.  all things creative and sensual, nature and nurture, coming to fruition.  the spirit that fills our existence, unstructured inspiration, joyful wholeness.  bring this loving, compassionate energy into your life, let it infuse your days and electrify your nights - start that project, support its growth!  pregnancy?  birth?  who knows?  be in nature, and feel thankful for all it offers!

The Chariot - authentic power and purpose, well earned victory.  who can we be through the refinement of our habits and rituals once we know ourselves?  "what's next" energy.  confidence and control.  harness this determined and triumphant energy for success - act on it with focus, push through, and win!  ...and maybe there's some travel coming soon for some of you?

Two of Pentacles - harmonies dancing in the midst of change.  skillfully balanced, but...are your priorities getting the attention they deserve?  adapt and flow, adjust as needed on repeat.  

bonus card:

The Moon - dreams, magic, mystery...honor your imagination, listen to your heart, and hold hands with your fear of the unknown.  nothing is what it seems, here, so use your intuition over your thought process, feel what's right in your gut.  work with the moon's phases, and it's light, for clarity and understanding.  finding those hidden truths, and freeing them from the past, is the best way forward.  

 

Tarot of a Moon Garden - The Moon card

 

I hope everyone has been well - and again, thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™

Friday, July 9, 2021

Moon Rose Water Ritual Bath/dreams

I made this amazing Rose Moon Water (pictured below) during my full moon ritual two weeks ago and a few days later, finally had the time and space to be able to bathe in it.  I put some of it in a small spray bottle and used it to mist my sheets, bed, face, and space with it, and I really loved the vibe it gave off.  I'd been feeling really connected to my late maternal grandmother, and I honestly think it's the roses - 'Rose' was her middle name, and she grew roses in her garden.  she made it very clear that she's offering love and support to me while I've been navigating some difficult family situations in the midst of mourning my mother (her daughter), who passed away three months ago.  as we're currently in a Neptune retrograde - a great time for this kind of work - I thought it would be nice to use my Rose Moon Water to help channel both my mother and her mother, and connect with them through dreamwork, where I meet with my ancestors.

 

image shows a glass mason jar filled with reddish-pink water infused with roses, and left out under a full moon

 

rose water is made by simmering rose petals in water, and moon water is made by leaving a jug of water out under the moon - during any phase; I just made this particular batch during the full moon.  so I made rose water from the roses I bought for the Solstice and used in my full moon ritual, then left the rose water out in the light of the full moon, and voilΓ !  Rose Moon Water!  moon water can be used in any of the ways that you use water - to charge and clean crystals, cleanse your energetic body, clean your home, water your plants, for drinking/bathing/cooking, basically everything!  rose water also has a myriad of uses including soothing skin ailments and irritations, treating sore throats/skin redness/acne/cuts and burns...it can be used in eye drops, to treat infection, to lift your mood and soothe headaches, reduce wrinkles, aid in digestion, to cook with, and makes a great facial cleanser and toner.  it's an antibacterial, anti-inflammatory, antiseptic, analgesic, antioxidant, antidepressant/anti-anxiety powerhouse!  so combining the rose water's natural healing properties with the energies of the full moon, I was looking forward to a great big healing rosy hug from my grandmother before retreating to my dream sanctuary to hopefully connect with both her and my mother on the other side of the veil. 

 

my mother and grandmother, when they were both younger than I am now.  image shows two women in printed dresses seated outdoors.
 

the general wisdom surrounding dreamwork is that one needs to enter a dedicated scared space in which to incubate the kind of dreams that go deeper than our minds just reliving our day - into that gateway between where we can experience meaning.  that this space not be our bedrooms is also part of that wisdom, though many of us don't necessarily have the ability to set up a space to sleep and dream in other than our bedrooms, so just work with what you've got.  if you do have that kind of space to play with - or you if you simply want to bring some of these elements into your existing bedroom - than the colors blue (believed to reduce heart rate and blood pressure), purple, and silver (for some 'otherworldly' charm) are good choices.


lucky me, jewel-tones of blue and purple with silver accents is my bedroom aesthetic.  image shows a white curtain blowing in the breeze across a blue and purple tapestry of peacocks in a tree.

 

for the bath, it goes without saying that the whole room be clean and tidy, but in a pinch, as long as the tub is clean, go for it.  I will leave the lights off and burn a bay leaf or two to clear the energies, then run the bath.  while the tub fills, I'll play some calming music or binaural beats, light some candles and incense, and place some crystals around the tub; I use quartz, amethyst, citrine, & rose quartz...if you have some moonstone, it would make the perfect addition.  there's also eucalyptus hanging in my shower, so the steam from the bath should release those oils as well.  I'll set out a small dish of honey to use as a facial cleanser, and in a bowl, combine: 

Epsom salt

baking soda

a few drops of lavender essential oil

dried rose petals

fresh freesia petals

during this prep work, it's important to be setting one's intentions all the while.  consciously listening to what the energies are telling us, moving in the ways they want us to go.  this much salt/soda (cup and a half?/like a teaspoon).  that much lavender (three drops, maybe).  these flowers...dance with it.  by now the bathroom is all steam and scent and soft sounds, and entering into it deepens a shifted mindset.  my head will already be both open and focused when I pour the Rose Moon Water into the filling tub, followed by the bowl of salt/soda/scent/flower petals.  and when the tub is full, it's time to call on one's guides, and step into the bliss. 

 

image shows flower petals floating in a bath.  there was so much steam it was hard to get any pictures!

soak in your delight.  talk to your crystals and touch them.  put some in the bath with you (careful!  some will dissolve, so do your research).  lay back and breathe deeply.  let your head empty, your shoulders relax, and your body heal.  pay special attention to any areas of your body that need it the most - massage any sore spots, scrapes, and cuts...feel where any energy might be blocked and help keep it moving.  ask yourself what you need.  ask your people to bring the answers to you in your dreams.  also be gentle with yourself, and go slowly - these experiences can be intense.  

when I'm done (usually when I start to doze off and/or the water starts getting too cold) I'll drain the tub and shower off.  this is a good time to use any special towels or robes that you save for ritual occasions; I'd say it's also a good time to use any fancy body products you might like to indulge with, but after all the magical goodness I added to my bath, I just let the natural oils seep into my skin and left it at that (my skin felt like rose petals).  the crystals get placed on the altar, and I'll take a moment to choose one to bring as I head to bed to dream... 

 

Coyote Woman Dreaming by Susan Seddon Boulet

 

now, the dreams we go looking for don't always come right away, but if we stay alert, we'll find them!  use the crystals in your work, or simply carry them around with you to keep the energy moving in a direction.  do use a dream journal every morning upon waking to write down what you remember of your travels in the night ~


art by Pawel Kuczynski

 

*the night of my bath, I dreamt my already long hair (to my butt) reached all the way to the floor, and whomever was there with me (Mom?) was measuring it either against their own, someone else's, or in general. long hair in dreams suggests growth, strength, and is an Earth symbol...the growth of the spirit, psychic abilities, and a connection to all living things. alternatively, it can suggest thinking long and carefully about a decision, or concentrating on a plan or situation. also indicative of good health, virility, sexuality, and vanity. can point to overthinking a situation and not acting.

 

again, thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this post is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™



resources:

some ritual practices from lunaluna for more info

some lunar bath rituals from well + good

Saturday, June 26, 2021

Neptune (Pluto, Saturn, Jupiter) Retrograde Shabbat Community Reading

whew!  now that we're through the eclipses, mercury retrograde, and the full moon, are you ready to settle into some Neptune retrograde energy (along with Pluto, Saturn, and Jupiter)?  I know I am!  

 



Neptune goes retrograde every year for 5 months - and it stays in each sign for 14 years, which apparently gives a certain nuance to entire generations.  currently in its own native sign of Pisces, Neptune encompasses deeply personal, creative, & dreamy energy...too much of it and we get muddled, cloudy, and can't distinguish between the realms of imagination and the day-to-day.  during its retrograde - because those are internal journeys - we can embrace the clarity and insight of our feelings, thoughts, intuition, and dreams that Neptune brings forward for us,which makes these great times for soul searching, meditation, and reconnecting with Self.

 

cool dreamy/watery image I swiped off the internet - I honestly could not find any info on it.

 

finding ways to strengthen our intuition is a great creative practice, and the kind of work that is its own reward.  caution:  manifest with pure intent only!  having a heart-to-heart with anyone we need to forgive (or who needs to forgive us) and embracing love will strengthen those ltr's.  DO DREAM WORK.  take good care of ourselves to stay grounded, and don't make any rash decisions. it seems that the advice is once again to "slow down and reflect" on everything...I feel like every month I ask "how much more of that can we possibly do?!"  I've slowed down so much, I feel like I'm in retrograde! Neptune and his ocean waters...all that mystery in which to trust our intuition. stop, look, and listen - be clear and flush out the ugly truths that need releasing.

this week's tarot/oracle questions come from Christine @moonandcactus, who offers us the affirmation:  "I let go of any fantasies that aren’t aligned with my true purpose."  also, "don't run away from truth/reality"...that's a good one that I'm holding close to the bone for my personal journey at the moment.  yup, all the bullshit is being stripped away again, and it's time to face up to doing our work (I'm still going through the paces of my eclipse shadow work).  we are encouraged to do it through the arts to get ourselves on a higher plane.  the clarity here has so much healing potential, given our heightened ability to see where we need to focus our work, and our empathy.  for this reading I used The Faeries Oracle because I owed them a favor, and we could all use some playfulness in our lives.  here's what we got: 

 

image shows 4 cards from The Faeries Oracle (The Faery Godmother/The Singer of the Chalice/G.Hobyah/Laiste, Moon's Daughter).  flourite, amethyst, and lapis lazuli for Neptune/Jupiter/Pluto; hematite for Saturn/Pluto; quartz and malachite for Neptune/Uranus; and Herkimer diamonds and garnet for Pluto.  brooch, seashell, tiny Waterhouse mermaid, fairy sword, dried rosebuds, tiny feather, tiny gargoyle, swan feather.


1. How can I be more aligned with my inner truth?  The Faery Godmother

 

 

 

Sairie - The Faery Godmother - speaks of gifts, talents, grace, and helpful lessons.  good things that we don't think we deserve, or haven't thought to ask for, may well be happening.  she helps us open our hearts to love and acceptance.  keep an eye out for unexpected good fortune when you thought bad luck was coming for you, and pass that kindness on.  enjoy the feeling of doing good in secret.


 

 

 

2. How can I be more open to what I’m not seeing?  The Singer of the Chalice


 

 

trust, joy, patience, creativity, hope, and miracles.  the Singer of the Chalice is about being open to unconditional love, healing, and more, as one big feeling that flows through us from the Universe, and if we can open ourselves up to one of those energies, then we can open ourselves up to all of them.  all we need to do is ask, so they know we're consciously ready to let them in. 

 

 

 

 

3. What kind of deception or illusion is currently present?  G.Hobyah

 

 

 

imaginary fears, unreal hazards, realistic caution.  to gain a greater ability to open our hearts the way the Singer of the Chalice asks us, we need to look for the truth behind our fears.  for the strength to face real challenges, we need to see them for what they truly are - and face them honestly - so we can distinguish between them, and what is a projection of our old traumas and fears onto our imaginary futures.  

 

 

 

 

4. What step is needed to remove my rose-colored glasses?  Laiste, Moon's Daughter


 

 

light cast in shadows, spiritual guidance, illumination, riddles.  Laiste wants us to pay attention to the mystical, and she's not beyond putting an obstacle or pitfall in our path to wake us up to the multiverse.  she is encouraging us to mine for subconscious treasure, the cosmic wisdom we don't even know we know, but...we know.  step into the flow of those feelings and lean into trusting that process.  the Moon's Daughter will leave symbols for us to read in our dreams.

 

 

 

 

 "If you lean into the work of self-reflection and find within you a profound willingness to feel the scary feels, the potential for coming out of this lunar cycle radically transformed in deep places in your consciousness is about as good as it gets...turn to whatever connects you most to the Divine during these few days for the comfort and courage that may be required of you at this time.  And remember, there is  no wound that Spirit cannot heal." - Michael Lennox

 

again, thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™

 

 

resources:

Lexi Hikari for Astrology Answers

moonandcactus

Jamie Partridge - Astrology King

Neptune music

Sunday, June 20, 2021

Solstice/Shabbat Community Tarot Reading

the whole reason I started making it a point to have Shabbat dinner on Friday nights was because it was an important and special family ritual that I grew up with that I wanted to continue with my own child, so he could have that same sense of connection and tradition, and a way to honor our cultural heritage. with him gone, I'm not entirely sure how to bring in Shabbat on my own.  I can light the candles and say those prayers.  I can say the rest of the prayers we say (the same ones my dad said) over the bread & wine, and take my sip, eat my pinch...but I'm not much in the mood for chicken soup, or a meal.



my recent foray into embracing the sabbath has been meditating on, and pulling tarot cards for, a community reading, but my well is empty right now, and I have no overflow with which to serve others at the moment. I thought of either doing a one-card pull for myself, to find a place to focus my energy, or write out a ritual for the Solstice tomorrow.  can I do both?  let's find out...  

 


 

...turns out I can't.  again, my well is currently empty, and everything is really hard and taking extra long for me right now.  please be patient with my grieving process, as it interlaces with all the other stress I am/we are navigating during this intense astrological/planetary time.

I set up a lovely Solstice altar with candles, a chalice of water, quartz crystals, garnets, citrine, and amber.  I put on the binaural beats, did my meditation, and pulled my cards.  then I realized I had left 6 of the cards from that particular deck tucked in my tarot journal from the last reading I did.  nice.  so I put the cards away and tried to work on a ritual to share instead, but I was just too tired and foggy to write it all out, so I called it a night.

 


 

today, this is my best: 

ritual - take a ritual bath.  circle up outdoors, preferably around a fire pit.  cast a circle, call in the quarters.  honor Sun deities, the Divine Light, Yang energy...the root, sacral, and solar plexus chakras.  sing, play, dance, drum, feast - Have Sex.  gather and direct the energy raised towards a specific purpose.  thank the quarters, open the circle, ground your energy.  blessed be.

    colors - orange, yellow, white, gold

    crystals - sunstone, serpentine, garnet, amber, citrine, carnelian

    flowers - roses, marigolds, sunflowers, seasonal fruits & veggies

    incense - sandalwood, saffron, frankincense, laurel

    activities - make flower crowns, garden, perform sun salutations, charge crystals out in the sun, 

    pick berries, lay in the sunshine

 

reading

image shows 6 cards from the Tarot of a Moon Garden deck, two garnets, and one citrine, on a pastel cloth with silver stripes.

 

what is the sun illuminating for us?  Temperance - balance, moderation, harmony...peace, patience.    the sun is shining a light on our inner calm and perspective, the ways we've learned not to get caught up in drama and adapt to the situations in our lives.  being in touch with who we are brings contentment, while taking the time to re-evalute our priorities will bring us an even greater sense of purpose.

what energy are we currently radiating out to the Universe?  The Tower - destruction, upheaval, chaos.  well, that's not a good look...though it could be!  this card is about change in the most profound way.  a Big change, happening Fast.  throw out the old, and start building something new.  this is unavoidable and scary, but usually brings us a truer foundation than what we were standing on before.

what do our souls need us to release to the sun?  6 of Staffs - victory, pride, celebrityall hail the conquering hero, riding through the crowd with their head high, drinking in the cheers...we need to let that go.  perhaps it's not the time to pat ourselves on the back for a job well done?  or just put the brakes on the swelled head that can come with it? 

how can we use the medicine of the sun for our growth?  Ace of Pentacles - prosperity, new beginnings.  this new cycle is suggestive of material things, of a seed that needs to grow in the secure ground of our stability.  nurturing this energy is abundantly rewarding, like watching our dreams become reality, and being ready for the challenge of realizing our potential.

what will manifest from our Solstice intentions over the next 3 months?  6 of Swords - moving on, leaving something behind.  in this card, we see a hardship overcome, and a move towards normalcy returning.  we may not like what had to leave behind to get here, and feel defeated and tired from the challenges we've had to face and overcome, but we are healing, and possibly heading towards a stronger version of ourselves.  we need to think rationally about the best ways to get there.

message from the sun?  Wheel of Fortune - changes, cycles, fate/destiny.  no one can avoid their turns on the wheel.  we must remember to enjoy the good while we have it, because everything can and does change in an instant, then changes again.  while the process can be uncomfortable, that inevitability is the only thing we can rely on - the Universe will maintain it's own balance, and we're mostly just along for the ride.

well that's all pretty intense...but shining a light on our Temperance while we're caught up in Tower energy will certainly bring our consciousness into how we're being the 6 of Staffs, and that Ace of Pentacles brings some hope to the hardships of the 6 of Swords as we all go for another turn on the Wheel of Fortune. the recent eclipses (lunar & solar) with so many planets in retrograde (four!) has been a wild ride, and while we're coming out of it, the astrology speaks to there being even more turmoil on the horizon.  so stay sharp, keep focused, and have your eyes on the prize (whatever that may be for you).

 


 thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™

 

Saturday, June 12, 2021

Shabbat Community Tarot Reading #4

wow, what a crazy week it's been for me - how about you?  so much upheaval and emotional drama!  even though we're 'through' the eclipse, we're still feeling its energy, and will be for a few days (weeks, months), and as we all know, the cosmic reverberations just keep circling out forever...  

I'm not sure where to start this week, as the reading I did was very personal, and specific to my circumstances.  I feel like if I'm going to read for the community, I can't pretend to be 'love and light' all the time, and like nothing ever goes wrong in my life because I'm claiming to offer to help people focus on doing their own deep work, so I have to show how I do mine.  

 


so - let's just say my child needs their community now in the form of a strong support network to help them navigate away from their current situation into something healthier for them in the long run.  the evil rage monster that lives in me has decided it's time for them to be free, rip off the band-aid, they're ready, I've done my job of preparing for this day well.  why postpone the inevitable?  they've embarked on their own underworld journey now, plumbing their own depths...the astrology would blow them away if they cared to look.  it's not my job to tell anymore, it's my job to love and let go, now.  but they don't want to leave, is the thing.  they wants to make demands of me, threaten and lash out.  they want all the benefits I've always provided - few though they may be - and to act indignantly while taking advantage and bringing so much conflict into our daily lives, I've been triggered back to my father throwing the kitchen table at me when I told him I was moving out (with a great deal more resources than my child has at the moment, though his daddy certainly had a lot less).  

the running away started with the tenuous stirrings of what might become first love.  now that there's 'someone else', I've become obsolete overnight, and have been shut out, and shut down.  so the arguments have escalated to where we're both teetering on the edge of violence, neither of us wanting to cross that line, and for years now, I've been sending them outside to deal with those feelings to get them away from me - it's my house, I won't be disrespected - and get them moving to physically help cycle that energy through.  so we argued, I told them to get out, and they demanded a therapist, so I called in mental health.  they called in CPS.  so now I'm under investigation for abuse, exacerbating an already intense housing crisis (impending homelessness), and did I mention my mom died two months ago?  it's fine...I'm sure I deserve all that and more, don't I?  but the bottom line in my opinion is that they've hit their wall - as have I - and it's time to figure out how to get them what they need from the support network they will build with the help of the authorities they've called in.  we can't live like this anymore.  it would have been nice to have the clarity to handle it on our own, but...oh well.


yeah, it's time to get out of their way, and leave them to it.  I caught a bit of a reading a day or two ago (I wish I could remember where!) that spoke to a wisdom coming in from the side, somehow...that it was important to pay attention to snippets that may come from random sources, and that was the kid yesterday - three times in the midst of the chaos they spoke honest truth, though I doubt they recognized the importance of what they said.  and between my own shadow work, Lorelai Kude's talk of overwhelm, and protecting what you've mothered, and Sasha's speaking of needing to let go of something anything, and 'where do we go from here' energy aligning with true direction and drastic change that has been a long time coming...I'm hearing this message loud and clear.  as hard as it is to focus through all the emotional turmoil, miscommunication, power struggles/control issues, change/liberation/chaos cycles, I'm doing my best to simply survive each day, which in the moment mostly looks like me trying to drink enough water, and failing, repeatedly.

so some cards for me.  some wisdom on how to step out of this dance.  help the kid get what they need to move forward and move along.  there's no coming back...things are irrevocably different and damaged now, so it's time to change course, and let life flow on by without me.  for this reading I used my oldest deck,  and this spread Meg @3am.tarot posted for the New Moon & Solar Eclipse in Gemini (June 10).  here's what we got:

 

image shows an antler, a crystal ball, a small metal goddess figurine, three cards from The Tarot of the Witches tarot deck (The Lovers/The Magician/The Chariot), a quartz crystal, and a garnet on a pastel colored cloth with silver stripes.

 

reflect onThe Lovers - one rose reaching towards the sun, while a briar entangles the moon.  such a strange card...look at the two of them, dispassionate mannequins entangled in her weird hair, that half dead-or-alive hill they're standing on.  a meaningful relationship...aside from all the love, beauty, harmony, deep feeling, trust, honor, physical attraction, there's the dynamic of sacred vs. profane, and a testing of theories.  an expansion - taking what we've learned, and re-centering from a new vantage point in a spiral progression.  widening the heart.  coming out of isolation into exchange - an act of radical vulnerability; a moment of truth.

revisit & exploreThe Magician - creative Source.  imagination, self-reliance, skill, willpower, curiosity, cleverness, unity in thought and feeling.  deeply connected to, and aware of, the resources surrounding us as well as the magic within them.  an expanding sense of possibility, the first step in a journey - packing The Fool's satchel.  confidence, awake to possibility, throwing open the doors.  expansion, opportunity, courage, tapping into potential.  knowing we are the magic.

seek truth withinThe Chariot - as soon as that expansion happened in the The Lovers card, the fool on their journey recognized their power, and met adversity with resolve and determination.  alert and ready for battle - horses charging forward, his foot on the yoke, he's prepared to balance his mental and physical strength in working towards greatness, as soon as he can get his emotions under control.

there is great significance to me in these cards, considering where my teen is currently holed up, and with cards 6 & 7 - The Lovers and The Chariot - showing up together like that, with only the Magician's spark between them.  there's that pattern of being pushed into things too early, before they're ready, because I'm already holding more than I can safely handle, and something's got to give.  this is my child, born three weeks early.  this is my child sliding down my leg because they won't hold on, they simply trust that 'I've got them'.  this is my child selling off their trains to pay the car insurance that one time.  this is my child's path to freedom - their first steps out on their own.  I'm not going to read their birth chart, or check their horoscope or anything because they didn't ask me to, and I respect people's privacy...but I can see what I see, you know?  all that trauma I tried so hard to avoid passing on, that I made sure to pass on.  our ancestors' hard-won aspirations now crushed beneath my personal failures, and it hurts to live here.

 

thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™

 

resources:

3am.tarot

good vibes binaural beats

Sunday, June 6, 2021

Shabbat Community Tarot Reading #3

bur oak

hello my darlings - I'm enjoying doing these community readings, and I hope you are getting something out of them too.  this week, I didn't feel called to ask any specific questions, I just wanted to clear my mind, shuffle, and see what the cards themselves had to offer.  the deck asking to be utilized for the task was the Celtic Tree Oracle - interesting because they're not really cards I use, but cards I keep because they were a gift from a dear friend, and many years ago, a deck belonging to a different dear friend gave me some profound insights into my life at that time.  while there isn't a Celtic bone in my body (though there could be a past life...), I deeply respect the traditions of others, and love the natural connection these cards invite us into through the trees.  as it happened, I had the opportunity to do this reading outdoors, so I sat down under a bur oak, and enjoyed the scent of wild rose in the air while paying attention to the details in the images.  though there is a particular system which one is supposed to employ for their use, I know these cards well enough to know that they don't mind my freestyling.  so - let's see what wisdom they have to offer us:

 

image shows three cards from The Celtic Tree Oracle deck on a pastel colored cloth with silver stripes.  on the left we have 'Quert' (apple), in the center 'Muin' (vine), and on the right Ioho (yew).  each card has the corresponding Ogham lettering in the border on each side of the center tree image, a detail below, and intricate knotwork designs all  around.



Quert - Apple:  ah, the apple!  one of the oldest known cultivated fruits, it is associated with choice, possibly between similarly attractive options, though the options may matter less than the fact of a choice needing to be made.  in Arthurian legend, apples are connected to Merlin and Avalon - a secret mystical island where the uninitiated must not eat of the fruit, for it contains the Pythagorean pentagram (the seeds in the shape of a star, possibly symbolizing divine wisdom).  it was both where Excalibur was forged, and where Arthur was laid to rest, and said to come back from someday. I always think of the Greek goddess Eris in connection to apples, and the chaos she instigated with her golden apple for 'the prettiest one' that started the Trojan War, as well as the Garden of the Hesperides where that golden apple was grown.

from "How Merlin Dwelt Among His Druids in a Secret Orchard in Celyddon, in the Emperor Arthur's Time"

      Seven-core and seven most fruitful Appletrees

               E'en since the very dawn of the age, there

      Had made spring murmurous with bright small bees

      Crooning their tune i' the white bloom-laden air:

      And 'neath the flaunting skies of midsummer

   Had swayed green plumy jewel-luminous seas:

 see also Poem:  Avallennau Myrddin (Merlin's Apple Trees) over at Contemplative Inquiry


Muin - Vine:  this card is associated with Lughnassadh/Lammas, the August 1st Celtic beginning-of-harvest-season festival dedicated to the Sun.  grape vines - in the context of wine - speaks to the release of prophetic powers, letting go of logic and intellect, and letting intuition lead.  permitting instinct to show you what needs doing, allowing emotion to flow freely, and openly trusting your senses to act for you.  be open to noticing all the signs and omens.  *at this point in my meditation of the cards I kept noticing a heavenly scent of flowers which I couldn't identify, but oh, it made me look!  on my way out of the park I found the source - these wild roses in the image posted below.  intoxicating!  I used to work at an apple orchard, and one of the many things I learned from old Mr. Soons was that roses are in the same family as apples, as are peaches, pears, plums, strawberries and cherries.  also, there's a theory that the golden apples in the Garden of the Hesperides - the "nymphs of the evening" - may really have been oranges! (signs & omens)

wild roses!

 


Ioho - Yew:  several of the oldest trees on Earth are yews, and as such, are deeply sacred.  their branches grow down into the ground to form new stems and trunks, and when the old trunk dies, new ones grow from it, giving this tree the meaning of rebirth and reincarnation.  a new soul sprung from ancient roots in a new body.  that the eldest of the oldest yew trees (age estimates vary between 2000 to 9000 years old) stand in churchyards shows they were previously sites of ancient Bardic/Druidic groves; interestingly enough, in 2015, one of these appeared to have changed sex (the ongoing reemergence of goddess energy in the collective consciousness?)!  the longbows the Celts were known for their skill with were carved from yew, and while the needles were historically used to brew poison, it can be used homeopathically as well.  this card is direct contact with your past, spiritual strength renewed, a revivification - understanding through wisdom that was always there, which we may have forgotten, or ignored.  things that were, are, always will be ~ 


Ioho (Yew) card detail with intricate boarder knotwork, Ogham letter, center image of tree, and inset detail of trunk, needles, and berries, in muted colors.

look for an upcoming choice, which when paying attention to signs omens, calls for the possibility of a new life growing from the old one.  dive deep into the well of your own understanding, and trust what you find there!

thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™


resources

Avellenau (Appletrees) The Black Book of Carmarthen, XVII

The Theosophical Path, Volume 15 edited by Katherine Augusta Westcott Tingley 

 Mythology and Folklore of Yew from Trees For Life

 The Darkness of the Yew from The Hazel Tree

Saturday, May 29, 2021

Shabbat Community Tarot Reading #2

whew!  the energy has been really emotional, chaotic, and electric with the full blood supermoon eclipse leading into the Mercury retrograde we're currently experiencing, so I thought I'd take some time this week to address shadow work - what it is, and why it's important (the abridged version).  shadow work is (very basically) working with the parts of yourself that you don't identify with, or aren't fully conscious of.  your 'dark side', if you will...some say it includes not only one's personal shadow, but society's neglected and repressed values as well.  whatever you refuse to acknowledge about yourself, qualities you're ashamed of, impulses you deny but see clearly in others, takes courage and strength to confront and accept.  this is shadow work, and is a continuous process to engage in throughout life.

eclipse season tends to bring change and upheaval - all the ugly stuff (fear, old wounds, painful memories) comes up for us to reflect on, and release what no longer serves us with gentle kindness.  and Mercury retrograde, which generally gets a bad rap for screwing up communications in all forms, electronics, business deals, and more, adds to the cosmic flux.  mistakes will be made.  double and triple check Everything, and back up your data!  make copies.  make sure your email/fax/message was received.  be extra clear.  because Mercury is retrograde in an air sign (Gemini), assume a great deal of discussion will need take place.  on the other hand, it's a great time to work with the past, and words that start with 're' - reassess, revisit, readdress, redo, redesign, repair, redirect, and repeat.  so while the energy may be frustrating, it's highly useful, and reminds us to slow down, consider where we stand, and take a closer, deeper look at our plans.  it seems we find more time to get things done, too, so maybe work on getting your files and closets reorganized!

with all that in mind, I decided to ask "what neglected and repressed values should we be working to address as a collective?"  we all know the obvious answers - poverty, racism, erasure, climate change, and more, but I'm curious to see what the cards bring up.  from there, I thought I'd ask simply "are we making progress in a direction that will do the most good for the most people?"  which led to the third question, "what is no longer serving us that needs to be released?"  this sort of feels like a repeat of the first question, because while we definitely need to be letting go of all those negative aspects of our current experience, I was once again curious what the cards would bring up.  here's what we got:


image contains three cards from The Living Altar Oracle and Spell Deck:  Generosity, Choice, Emergence.  also quartz crystals, seeds, acorns, a seashell, a geode, and a salt crystal.

"what neglected and repressed values should we be working to address as a collective?" - Generosity - this card is water, and comes to us from the West; from sunset and midlife; it is Autumn, an ancestor, council and initiation.  it is speaking to us of power cultivated through wisdom, an openness, freedom to enjoy the dance of the seasons...community, reflection, the nurturing of fruit to seed.  the message here is to pay attention to both our hard-earned lessons, and our curiosity.  I'm reading it as a reconnection - to ourselves, to our chosen families, to our communities...recommitting to the success of the larger collective rather than to individual desires.  that we should lean in to the tempered wisdom of our elders, while learning from the wide-eyed wonder of our children.   

"are we making progress in a direction that will do the most good for the most people?" - Choice - this card is air, and comes to us from the East; from sunrise and childhood; it is Spring, a promise, emergence, and rebirth.  it is speaking to us of presence, divine intervention, a path laid out before us like an invitation.  do we accept its offer, or turn away?  we are wild and meant to fly, hopeful, and show others that they can, too.  the message here is to pay attention to the wisdom we gain on our adventures.  I'm reading it as a relearning of how to lead - a new way of spreading our wings, influenced by our collective need for higher goals and purpose...seeing a better way forward, and embarking upon it with intention.   

"what is no longer serving us that needs to be released?" - Emergence - this card is air, and comes to us from the East; from sunrise and rebirth; it is Spring, creativity, inspiration, and intention.  it is speaking to us of the grace of innocence, wholeness, and an abundance of potential.  of being open, sure, and calling back our power with a renewed sense of wonder, purpose, and hope.  the message here is to gather up our knowledge of death and endings, and challenge ourselves to begin again, embracing and anticipating with excitement the wonder of the unknown.  I'm reading it as an indication that we need to give up any fear we have around reimagining our systems, and outdated ways of thinking and being, so that we may fully emerge into the next stage of who we can come to be...by trusting and knowing that we have learned all our lessons from our past, and by accessing our potential to make better choices for our future.  

thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™

 

sources:

https://www.astrologyzone.com/everything-you-need-to-know-about-mercury-retrograde/

https://foreverconscious.com/intuitive-astrology-forecast-june-2021

Saturday, May 22, 2021

Shabbat Community Tarot Reading

Shabbat Shalom, all!  this week, while lighting my candles and sending out my prayers, there was a lot on my mind.  as the mother of a teenager, I know a few other mothers of teenagers, and it seems a lot of us are stressed to the max.  that's probably because our kids are stressed to the max, given the collective trauma we've all been living through, and even though my relative American poverty pandemic experience might look like paradise on a popsicle stick to someone in India right now, we've all had about enough of isolation and disconnect to last us a good while.  so I thought I'd do a reading for the kids, and by extension, for all the struggling moms (parents).

I didn't want to ask "how do we best support our children" because the answer to that is always "love them" (I mean, love is the answer to everything, right?).  so I asked "how can we best help our children learn to support themselves?"  and then for us, the moms, why ask what we need to survive, thrive, and lift up our families because the answer to that is also always "love" (and a robot slave).  so I asked "how can we best refill our wells right now as both caregivers, and bodies needing care?"  and finally, to tie the reading together (the way a rug can really tie a room together, lol), "how can we ensure we're doing our best to protect our Earthly legacy for the generations?"  here's what we got:


image shows three tarot cards - The Emperor reversed, The Hermit, 7 of Cups reversed - surrounded by a small metal goddess figure, quartz crystals, polished rose quartz, garnets, magnolia & wisteria seeds, a bear tooth, a large white feather, and a small red and green feather, on a light colored iridescent scarf with fringes, and a dark fuzzy blanket.


"how can we best help our children learn to support themselves?" - The Emperor reversed - well that message is pretty clear...Smash The Patriarchy!  The Emperor is a powerful leader representing authority and structure, who is focused and disciplined.  he's all about setting those firm foundations and boundaries, and standing in our power, but here he's in the reversed position, which speaks to an abuse of those powers...a sure sign that his rules and systems are no longer working.  a loss of focus in a bid to keep his tenuous control finds him failing those he swore to protect.  so the best way to help our children learn to support themselves could be through leaning into their creativity, teaching them to speak up and out when overreaching community leaders/teachers/parents/authority figures/clergy attempt to silence them, let them feel ALL their feelings (boys especially) and then rewrite the rules.  it's their world, now, and they have to live with the messes we leave them, so we should probably just get in the back, learn to trust their wisdom, and let them invent it all anew.

"how can we best refill our wells right now as both caregivers, and bodies needing care?" - The Hermit - I guess we all need some alone time, huh?  a cave to run off to where we can ponder the deeper mystery of ourselves, and plum the shadowed depths of our souls?  I know I've surely been doing this...have you found yourselves retreating from the world a bit to clean up your own head lately?  and doing your best to give those around you space, too?  it seems weird that in an almost-post-pandemic world, what we might feel a need for is more space, but I think it's a different kind of space.  space to do work in, to look at our actions and reflect on who we are and what we do; how we interact in the world, and in what ways we connect to our higher purpose. it's a place of contemplation and meditation, self-reflection and solitude.

"how can we ensure we're doing our best to protect our Earthly legacy for the generations?" - 7 of Cups reversed - this indicates coming back into focus after a period of confusion, or feeling hemmed in by a lack of options.  in the context of the question, I read this as we humans realizing we're at a point of no return with our environment/planet, and making some sound choices to change our behaviors to address those pressing issues rather quickly, out of necessity.  I wonder if many of those solutions will come from the minds and hands of those teenagers we'll be handing the reins to, after our period of retreat and self-reflection?  maybe they'll learn to integrate their various energies in ways that will help them work together, share intelligences, and build more collaborative and sustainable futures?  isn't that always the hope?  well, it's mine anyway, and maybe some of yours, too.

thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  

πŸ’™πŸ’œπŸ’™

Sunday, May 9, 2021

Mom-eries


sometime after I turned 12, while rummaging around in my mom's little makeshift library in our large, well-lit basement, I came across a story she had written in the late 60's as a pregnant newlywed living on a kibbutz in Israel, while my dad was off fighting in the Six-Day War.  I think of her, painting the light-bulbs black and leaving only a small spot for the light to filter through, to conceal themselves as best they could, as some of the fighting was quite near the kibbutz.  how she must have looked, the anxiety she must have been feeling, and the hope she must have been trying to hold on to through those words.  I wish I had a copy of the story called "Sarah" where she began by recalled the story of the Biblical Sarah, watching her Abraham take her only beloved son Isaac to be sacrificed on the altar of this 'new god' he was communing with, and questioning what kind of god he was to demand such a travesty as tribute.  then there was a page break after which she wrote, "I am Sarah..." (it was her Hebrew name) and wrote about how so many of the women felt, watching their men go off to battle, wondering if they'd come back, and if they did, if they would come back 'whole'.  the story switched back to the Biblical Sarah's perspective - an anxious mother watching for her husband to return from the mountain alone, her heart deeply wounded, only to see two silhouettes on the horizon, and running to them filled with the highest joy and gratitude.  to conclude, she wrote about reading over the lists of names of the deceased, and her relief at not finding her husband there (though many other women did, and I don't wish to diminish the memory of those that we mourned), along with her elation when my father returned to her, safe and sound.

 


today is that dreaded stupid holiday I know I've written about on here before, though I couldn't find any of those posts in a quick search.  as a single mom, Mother's Day is just another day for me to do all the mom things, and get little to no appreciation for my efforts.  when my Teen was little, I'd get some cute paper projects that his teacher made all the kids do in school, and there was that one year when he drew me breakfast in bed - so cute!  there might have even been some cheap gifts that the wealthy school district donated for the poor kids to bring home, but that might have just been for Hannukah, I don't remember.  either way, my point is, today is a day for me to stay off of social media because seeing all the 'proper' families doing all the culturally acceptable things for the moms in their lives makes me feel inadequate on a good day, which is to say nothing of how it makes me feel on a day like today, when I'm missing my own mom, who passed away 6 weeks ago.  my day so far has consisted of the horrid odor of the septic tank being pumped, followed by the horrible smell of the bleach I used to clean the backed-up excrement out of my bathtub - though I am grateful that there's no longer human waste bubbling up from the drain, and that my toilet is once again flushing properly.  then I sat down to honor my mom by writing about her, and began to cry.  just now, my Teen woke up and emerged from his bedroom, mumbled 'good morning', made himself a bowl of cereal, and went back into his room to commence the day's video gaming.  yup.  that's it.  stuff that in your Mother's Day pipe and smoke it, because I have laundry to do, dishes to wash, paperwork to sort and file, etc, etc...no brunch and mani/pedi's here.  no champagne or flowers, massages, chocolates, what-have-you.

 


but the point here was to talk about my mom.  she was the ideal mother up until I hit puberty, and things went downhill for us from there.  even though we had a rocky relationship, she was my mom, and I always loved her, even when I hated her.  she drove 4 1/2 hours to the hospital in February - even though she hated Winter, and I lived in Vermont - when I went into labor, because she desperately wanted to see her youngest grandchild being born (she wasn't allowed in the room for my sister-in-law's three births, which I understand from my sister-in-law's point of view, though I can also understand my mom's disappointment).  she adored my son from the get-go (as she did all her grandchildren), even though she couldn't restrain herself from making some pointed comments about...ahem, the other half of his dna...when he was very little, which I immediately nipped in the bud.  we spent years on the outs, with a few good times here and there, but all in all, now that she's gone, those bad times hardly matter at all, and I just wish we had had more time to be friends, and keep making the good memories.  she spent two weeks with me before she passed, and I'm SO grateful we had that time together, for myriad reasons.  her death was unexpected, to say the least...and the hurdles that needed to be cleared in order to lay her to rest on our kibbutz in Israel, next to her beloved husband, during a global pandemic, were many - but it did happen.  

 


so yeah - I'm a big emotional mess today.  how to honor her memory?  she didn't like cut flowers, "because they were dead".  I do, so maybe I'll buy myself some.  she enjoyed being taken out for brunch by her grandkids, but I'm still estranged from the rest of my family, so that's not going to happen...perhaps I can cook up one of her recipes?  that's a possibility.  I can't visit her grave, as it's in another country...I'm not financially solvent enough to donate to a good cause like Miry's List, which helps welcome refugee families into new communities, or the National Bail Out fund, specifically for Black moms, but I can share the link, and maybe someone else who is, can.  I can visit the waterfall in Parksville where she spent childhood summers, and liked to go to honor her ancestors, watch a movie that she loved, or listen to music she enjoyed.  maybe I can even work on one of the several knitting projects I'm sure I have tucked away among my craft hoard.  I'm planning to do a tarot card pull and see if she wants to offer me any advice through that medium.  and - and this is big - I can mother myself.  that's right, I still need mothering, too (don't we all?  no matter how old we get?), and even though I've been working on that for years, I still need the reminder that I'm worthy of my own best mothering techniques, which include wrapping myself up in comfort, and making sure I feel nourished, whatever that might look like for me in the moment.  today, I guess that looks like doing dishes/laundry/paperwork and avoidance, but I may also take some time to lay up on the couch, and demand that the Teen cook me dinner - he's fully capable, and it's the least I deserve out of respect for all I do for him.  we'll see...(he made cheeseburgers and frozen French fries, yum!)

and not only that, let's take more than a moment to remember the Great Mother who gives life to us all, this amazing planet we live on!  here's a link to help find some ways to do that, if you don't (or even if you do) make caring for our Earth a part of your daily life.  

 


 

in honor of the mothers I've known, and the ancestors I didn't, today I remember Sue (Sarah), Ayala, Sapta, Sapta Liza, Grandma Mirjam, Little Grandma, Regina, and Estar.  thank you for everything ~ πŸ’–


Wednesday, March 3, 2021

Deck Review: The Living Altar





The Living Altar, an oracle and spell deck for the radical witch by Kiki Robinson & Ylvadroma Marzanna Radziszewski, centers everything the entire world should be focusing on in this time and place, using the language necessary to accomplish transformation.  from the first "disrupt the status quo", to the last "ours is a zeitgeist of renaissance & reinvention", this deck is a learning experience for me that came through a moment of connection between myself, my heritage, and a tarot-fluent acquaintance.  for most of my almost 40 years of reading tarot I've used the same deck - the first one I got at the beginning of my journey - and recently, after being gifted several new-to-me decks, it only took a minute to notice how cis/heteronormative/eurocentric most decks are, and as those are ideas and a kind of ideal I'm doing my best to move away from in as many ways as possible, I decided I needed a different kind of 'new'.  so I went looking for decks that connect me to my traditional cultural heritage (which is rife with issues) and ended up being gifted The Living Altar deck by someone who thought it belonged more to me than to them.  I really appreciate the opportunity to work with Romani artists, businesses, and witches, and this deck is a true call to action. 


 

it's frankly a bit shocking how many decks and readers are out there, now...the whole discipline feels a bit saturated, but I must be getting old, because I find myself saying that about lots of things I used to be only one of a few people doing that's become more acceptably 'mainstream'!  it's good, though - we need it.  we need SO many more people to get in better tune with their cultural dynamic, and bring their magic into alignment with their own everyday rituals.  this deck, with its 52 oracle cards, 14 ritual activation cards, comprehensive guidebook, and an endless variety of entry points with which to approach the work, I honestly felt a bit out of my depth at first sight.  the nuances reminded me of the Enochian system, which I haven't worked with in a long time, and it definitely felt like approaching an intricate new tool as a beginner.  laying the cards out in the wheel pattern helped to see the deck as a whole, and to connect with it in full bloom, as it were - so pretty!

 


 

the cards are big, heavy, and there's so much going on with them visually.  I like how they feel, though my hands are small, so it's hard to hold the whole deck at once.  to begin, I did the Living Altar spread because it used the least amount of cards, is about struggle and the need for support, and was suggested as a ritual of self-devotion with which to draw courage and get hyped.  the cards I drew were all from the 3rd narrative arc, those spells having to do with elemental everyday practical magic moments on the cusp between the death/rebirth cycle.  here's a stripped-down version of my result ~ 


top card - creativity, card 2 - inspiration, card 3 - resource, card 4 - relationship




  


the top card - card 1 - is The Altar, a goal/skill/spell to nourish/honor/tend to/celebrate.  honoring inspiration by putting it into action.  creativity means transforming, trusting, letting go, stepping into the new.  it asks us (as all the cards do) "what wisdom is alchemizing within you?"

 card 2 - The Heart - how our hearts come to The Altar, & how best to nourish and access it.  inspiration says allow it to be undone, and moved through.  let it change us in the ways it's meant to. accept this invitation to begin that process.

card 3 - The Body - same question about how best to access and nurture, how is The Body showing up?  the way resource tells it, with age and wisdom...like the person I hope to become, the vessel I'll leave behind with as many gifts to offer those who come after as I can.

card 4 - The Ally - an invitation from the Wheel to access necessary resources to tend The Altar.  relationship tells us to get ourselves some spiritual community for that collective well-being, & true intersectionality.

 



radical indeed...I dig these cards, with their bold red edges, collage art, and textural allure.  I can feel how So Much went into creating them, and working with them, drawing energy through them, and capturing that moment in digital amber.  I look forward to spending more time with this deck, and getting to know all the myriad ways it can inform and enhance my practice, for and with the collective.