Shabbat Saturn in Aries/Aquarius Solar Eclipse/'Ezekiel Conjunction' Shalom & Community Reading

wow, Shabbat again already?  time is just passing more and more quickly for me, and I'm reminded of how after my father died at 57, I just assumed I would, too.  I turned 57 last month, and it's been a hard transition.  I started this post on the 13th of February, and didn't have the energy to finish it, so I'm picking up where I left off, with Saturn having entered Aries on the 15th:

there's SO much astrological 'stuff' whirling around us that been it's sapping my energy quite a bit.  from May through September of last year, Saturn was moving through Aries, and during that time, it gave us "a brief glimpse into the lessons and gifts that...we need to step up and take greater responsibility for" (according to one astrologer I tend to like, link at the end of this post).  while Aries is impulsive, fast-moving energy that likes to set things in motion, Saturn prefers to take it slow and calculate all the risks before choosing to proceed.  so you can see why I'm fatigued by the push and pull of it, and though I'm a bit desperate to move forward with my 'next steps' (whatever they turn out to be), I'm busy feeling stuck and doubting myself at the moment. 

 

looking back at what I was doing during the May-September Saturn in Aries window of 2025 that was a prelude to what's happening now, I was definitely exhibiting my "willingness to take leaps of faith and start new things" by getting several different jobs in a row as I learned what it means to work in this country, and how to deal (or not deal) with the agencies and people behind them.  so I'm hoping this time, instead of jumping impulsively from one opportunity to the next without a great deal of information to go on past my need to cover my rent and bills, I can focus with more clarity on where I need to put my energy in order to feel more grounded and aligned towards opportunities where I can follow through and experience some sustainable growth over this two year cycle.  

then two days later on the 17th, the Aquarius 'Ring of Fire' Solar Eclipse hit us:

the eclipse energy is all about new paths, transforming and awakening, and a 'surprise' that will be "shifting our consciousness in ways we could not have predicted".   and what is ending in order to clear the way to build a new foundation?  I guess that will be made clear by August.  we're looking for a gentle pathway towards healing - transformative, softening, "turning to nature and our intuition for guidance".  we need to pay attention to our dreams, what we're putting in our bodies, and are encouraged to ask for signs and stay open to what insights may come.  setting open ended intentions and trusting the process are also part of this lunation.

 

looking back to 2017/18 (when 'eclipse season' last happened in this sign) for clues about what may be coming up for me, I found myself building my life with my small family - taking good care of my son and nurturing his friendships, supporting his creativity and growth, and enjoying two really fun vacations together.  I took a deeper dive into my activism within the Roma community while building a small tribe of friends-as-family around us where we also shared spiritual connectivity and even some ritual work.  I took care of both my mother and a dear elder I had known for decades, and really started to enjoy being in the kitchen and learning recipes old and new.  there were some buried traumas that unfortunately needed to come to the surface for me, but on the whole, I did a great deal of work towards centering my own health, remembering my passions, and reviving practices that had been been the cornerstone of my identity forever before I got sidetracked by all the noise of life.  it was a solid time in our lives where I was able to keep us relatively stable, and my son and I thrived as a result, in many areas of our lives.  lots of good news there! 

then last but certainly not least, we experienced the 'Ezekiel Conjunction' (as Lorelai Kude called it) on the 20th, when Saturn and Neptune met at 0 degrees Aries, which hasn't happened since 593 bce:

 

The Chariot of G*d, Art by Mikayla Ragsdale

 

this event is all about rupture and reconstruction as 'holiness no is longer bound to a single place and becomes mobile', signalling a collapse of illusions into reality or the end of a long myth-cycle.  a reckoning between idealism and structure, if you will, a "time to forge a new reality from scratch".  we are expected to be grieving as we enter this time of renewal, as we learn to take personal responsibility for our actions (offer up a prayer for collective opening).  "the collapse of inherited meaning is followed by the demand for a new moral architecture...the end of illusion". are we ready to grow up and stop looking for someone to come and save us? we'd better be - we need to do it on our own. do we know who we are without the stories we've been telling ourselves all these years? we are being called to exist without all the old baggage, and to surrender to compassion. a very tall order, indeed.

I'm truly very tired, so I'll just pull one card (using the Thoth deck) and see what it says ~

 

well, would you look at that?  I can't think of a better card for our current astrological situationship.  the Queen of Swords sits on her throne of clouds ready to slice through All The Illusions to get to What's Real.  she works to refine the world, upgrading our understanding so we can fully become ourselves.  that head (or mask) in her hand represents breaking away from old roles and behaviors towards the light of liberation.  she frees our minds to make logical decisions, encourages clear and concise communication, cutting through old patterns that hold us back to see things fresh with the eyes of a child, showing us the courage and conviction to move forward in a new way.  having had a hard journey towards becoming, she also shows her vulnerability and 'goes with the flow'.  ultimately, she uses her intuition to gain insight, then uses her intellect to get what she wants out in the world.  and that seems to be exactly what what we're being asked to do. 

 

Saturn in Aries

Aquarius Solar Eclipse

Ezekiel Conjunction part 1 & 2

Shabbat Aquarius Full Moon/Lion's Gate Portal Shalom

in order to prepare and perform ritual tonight for the full moon, I'm immediately stuck, thinking "what can use to cleanse my aura before, or use for anointing myself after?"  and then, "I know I have homemade rose powder in my altar box (along with an aura cleansing tool), it's just not accessible at the moment!"  frustrating.  so I go out to the meerspeset to see if the moon is visible in the sky, and There She Is - appearing in a break in the clouds, and as always, taking my breath away.  there.  I can just cleanse my aura in moonlight, and use fresh, clean, moon water for anointing myself after I've done my ritual.  we make do with what we have in the moment, yes?

 

so I fling my arms out wide and facing east, turn myself around in the moonlight to the south, west, and north, opening myself up to - and inviting in - all the loving energies flowing around and through me.  I ask them to help remove all energy and emotion that isn't mine, and doesn't belong to me, so that I feel uplifted, my heart open, and the energies I want to work with can move freely through me.  I thank them for joining me as I endeavor to stand in my own light.

to cleanse and prepare my space, I light my Shabbat candles and use my regular, everyday broom to sweep the meerpeset while envisioning a glowing, healing light charging the area with loving energy, peace, hope, and positivity.  I sing a little 'thank you' song about cleansing my space with love and gratitude as it begins to feel magical and protected.

 

 

taking my bowl of water in both hands, I state out loud the things I would like to release, clear, and receive some clarity around in my life, such as anger, resentment, and more mundane issues pertaining to my flow of financial abundance - or lack thereof - this month in particular, and in my life in general.  I then sit with my candles and bowl of water, in my protected space, and once again call to my ancestors (and others) to help center and ground my energy while connecting to my Higher Being.  I bring my hands to my heart and speak to that energy center in my body, and to my third eye, so that I may be better guided by my insight and intuition in my meditations.

 

opening the case where I keep my tarot cards, the first deck I see is the Thoth deck, which feels just right for tonight's reading.  settling back into my lounge chair under the light of the full moon - and the energy of the lion's gate portal - I begin to shuffle...awkwardly.  this deck is still new to me and I've hardly used it since I got it because it's slightly different from the more popular and well-known decks, and requires (in my opinion) more study to be properly understood.  so as I'm feeling the cards slip through my fingers from one hand to the other, I get a 'jumper', which I don't always work with.  since my hands are small, I have several ways that I shuffle decks, and there are times when a card will align awkwardly, or slip out of place, so I'll just tuck it back in and keep on shuffling.  this one dove all the way under my chair, face up, so I set it aside and went on with my shuffle until I was satisfied, and drew a card.

 

 

10 of Wands.  curious.  and the jumper was the Princess of Wands.  even curiouser.  

the 10 of Wands in the Crowley/Harris deck is called Oppression, and indicates that one has become detached from their spiritual sources, and that no matter how much force is used (implying too much force has already been used), it cannot be brought to bear on the situation at hand.  feeling trapped where we can't experience life the way we want, with the flames having run rampant from lack of understanding, devouring one's self from within.  failure against a strong opponent, revenge, cruelty, malice, and injustice. 

the Princess of Wands is considered the Earth aspect of fire - two elements that tend to strengthen each other, yet this pairing is considered combustible, implying this Princess has a reactive personality.  she is associated with the 'whims of the body', or the 'animal soul'; considered to be turning her back on the mundane to follow her passions and inspiration.  she is energetic, vital, enthusiastic, and courageous, in no way afraid to express herself.  she tends to be ungrounded, and subscribes to her own brand of justice which can run towards vengeance and cruelty.  having that tiger by the tail can indicate setting one's self free from old fears and patterns by bringing them to the surface and conquering them, usually learning these lessons 'the hard way'.  she represents the silence to which all things return, and is considered both permanent and non-existent.  consuming all that come into her sphere, she is Lilith; the dark, mysterious Feminine, and her body is the fuel of the Sacred Fire. 

wow.  that has a lot of deeply personal meaning for me, which I will - believe it or not - keep to myself.  but if you know me...you may, as they say, Know.

 

 

I let the water sit out overnight to absorb all the good moonlight it could, and just before dawn, I thanked it for soaking up the things I wished to release, clear, and gain clarity on while my intentions begin to weave themselves into the fabric of my life in a peaceful, calm, and loving way.  I released those intentions from the water, and returned it to the Earth by pouring it through the drain in the meerpeset to run into the ground below to purify it.  

skipping the anointing as I already poured out the water, I once again brought my hands to my heart center and third eye while repeating the mantra 'I am love, I am loved, I radiate love'.  there happened to be some lime seeds hanging out in the bowl I used for the moon water, and before I poured it out, I took the seeds out of it and set them aside for planting.  we'll see how that goes.

Shabbat Shalom, and Blessed Be! 

lessons

and in those moments, when the plan becomes clear

shoulders release and neck rolls

down your spine to

shimmy your hips

in the garden

"bro, 

let's build a house 

on the parents' farm.  

for our generations."

lesson.

 

to be fair, I got to smoke some weed the other day, for the first time since smoking the last hit in my stash from Vermont.  lit the bat as soon as the exit appeared on the road to the airport, and put it in my purse where it's been since then.  I know the airport security dog was looking at me and it definitely made me nervous, but I was looking back at her, and she didn't seem concerned enough about me to alert her humans who were having what I assumed to be their regular morning work chat.  so I basically went 'cold turkey' for the past 3 1/2 months from being a chronic smoker most of my adult life to no attitude adjustment at all.  how about that?  

 

 

honestly it seemed like a good idea to have my head on as straight as possible while trying to immigrate to another country, and I'm glad I have, but MAN.  I've had some tense moments.  enough that I've considered buying some alcohol just to have enough to drink with my dinner to loosen up a little.  I guess I still - and will always - prefer weed over alcohol, since that summer of...1985?

when I smell herb on the streets I'll look around to see if I can catch a vibe off of whoever's smoking it, if I can even find them on the sidewalk, or sitting at a table as I'm walking past.  obviously by my writing it, that hadn't happened yet.  I had the opportunity to hop on a bus tour for 15nis ($4 and change), so I went.  we were stopped to patronize the local breakfast joint when I smelled that particular perfume on my way back to the bus, so I walked over and asked the folks if I could hit what they were smoking, and they gave me the tail end of their joint.  hoo-rah.

 

 

and my lift arrived, and my staffs - wrapped in my tapestries - were missing, and I was losing my mind so I called the international shippers and lost my mind on them, then called the Vermont shippers and left them a piece of whatever might have been left.  and to both of their credit, my missing pieces was located quickly, and plans are being made on how to get them to me as soon as possible.  I am incredibly pleased to have the emotional hug of seeing my treasured belongings on this side of the sea, with a special nod to those that came from here, embodied within them the energies of those I hold dear.  really, the missing package was no big deal, even though it was my whole heart, and I didn't need to yell at them.  I could have asked nicely, and the outcome would have been the same.  lesson.

 

 

 

then I couldn't find my loom which I had been concerned about since before leaving the States.  I told myself I would find it when I opened the box again in Israel, but when I opened the box and searched it, the loom was not there.  luckily, in thinking about where else I might have put it, it was found.  yay!  lesson.

a person on the tourist trip reminded me that we have more power to 'choose our own adventure' than we realize.  and I realize that everything is going to be ok, and I am going to make my way and fulfill my purpose here.  everything I've done and experienced up until this moment has led me here.  To The Promised Land, lol!  trust the process.  I have some more healing to do.  lesson ~

I'm so proud of me.

☆  ★ ☀ ✨🌕✨ ☀ ★  ☆