Saturday, June 26, 2021

Neptune (Pluto, Saturn, Jupiter) Retrograde Shabbat Community Reading

whew!  now that we're through the eclipses, mercury retrograde, and the full moon, are you ready to settle into some Neptune retrograde energy (along with Pluto, Saturn, and Jupiter)?  I know I am!  


Neptune goes retrograde every year for 5 months - and it stays in each sign for 14 years, which apparently gives a certain nuance to entire generations.  currently in its own native sign of Pisces, Neptune encompasses deeply personal, creative, & dreamy energy...too much of it and we get muddled, cloudy, and can't distinguish between the realms of imagination and the day-to-day.  during its retrograde - because those are internal journeys - we can embrace the clarity and insight of our feelings, thoughts, intuition, and dreams that Neptune brings forward for us,which makes these great times for soul searching, meditation, and reconnecting with Self.


cool dreamy/watery image I swiped off the internet - I honestly could not find any info on it.


finding ways to strengthen our intuition is a great creative practice, and the kind of work that is its own reward.  caution:  manifest with pure intent only!  having a heart-to-heart with anyone we need to forgive (or who needs to forgive us) and embracing love will strengthen those ltr's.  DO DREAM WORK.  take good care of ourselves to stay grounded, and don't make any rash decisions. it seems that the advice is once again to "slow down and reflect" on everything...I feel like every month I ask "how much more of that can we possibly do?!"  I've slowed down so much, I feel like I'm in retrograde! Neptune and his ocean waters...all that mystery in which to trust our intuition. stop, look, and listen - be clear and flush out the ugly truths that need releasing.

this week's tarot/oracle questions come from Christine @moonandcactus, who offers us the affirmation:  "I let go of any fantasies that aren’t aligned with my true purpose."  also, "don't run away from truth/reality"...that's a good one that I'm holding close to the bone for my personal journey at the moment.  yup, all the bullshit is being stripped away again, and it's time to face up to doing our work (I'm still going through the paces of my eclipse shadow work).  we are encouraged to do it through the arts to get ourselves on a higher plane.  the clarity here has so much healing potential, given our heightened ability to see where we need to focus our work, and our empathy.  for this reading I used The Faeries Oracle because I owed them a favor, and we could all use some playfulness in our lives.  here's what we got: 


image shows 4 cards from The Faeries Oracle (The Faery Godmother/The Singer of the Chalice/G.Hobyah/Laiste, Moon's Daughter).  flourite, amethyst, and lapis lazuli for Neptune/Jupiter/Pluto; hematite for Saturn/Pluto; quartz and malachite for Neptune/Uranus; and Herkimer diamonds and garnet for Pluto.  brooch, seashell, tiny Waterhouse mermaid, fairy sword, dried rosebuds, tiny feather, tiny gargoyle, swan feather.

1. How can I be more aligned with my inner truth?  The Faery Godmother




Sairie - The Faery Godmother - speaks of gifts, talents, grace, and helpful lessons.  good things that we don't think we deserve, or haven't thought to ask for, may well be happening.  she helps us open our hearts to love and acceptance.  keep an eye out for unexpected good fortune when you thought bad luck was coming for you, and pass that kindness on.  enjoy the feeling of doing good in secret.




2. How can I be more open to what I’m not seeing?  The Singer of the Chalice



trust, joy, patience, creativity, hope, and miracles.  the Singer of the Chalice is about being open to unconditional love, healing, and more, as one big feeling that flows through us from the Universe, and if we can open ourselves up to one of those energies, then we can open ourselves up to all of them.  all we need to do is ask, so they know we're consciously ready to let them in. 





3. What kind of deception or illusion is currently present?  G.Hobyah




imaginary fears, unreal hazards, realistic caution.  to gain a greater ability to open our hearts the way the Singer of the Chalice asks us, we need to look for the truth behind our fears.  for the strength to face real challenges, we need to see them for what they truly are - and face them honestly - so we can distinguish between them, and what is a projection of our old traumas and fears onto our imaginary futures.  





4. What step is needed to remove my rose-colored glasses?  Laiste, Moon's Daughter



light cast in shadows, spiritual guidance, illumination, riddles.  Laiste wants us to pay attention to the mystical, and she's not beyond putting an obstacle or pitfall in our path to wake us up to the multiverse.  she is encouraging us to mine for subconscious treasure, the cosmic wisdom we don't even know we know, but...we know.  step into the flow of those feelings and lean into trusting that process.  the Moon's Daughter will leave symbols for us to read in our dreams.





 "If you lean into the work of self-reflection and find within you a profound willingness to feel the scary feels, the potential for coming out of this lunar cycle radically transformed in deep places in your consciousness is about as good as it gets...turn to whatever connects you most to the Divine during these few days for the comfort and courage that may be required of you at this time.  And remember, there is  no wound that Spirit cannot heal." - Michael Lennox


again, thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  





Lexi Hikari for Astrology Answers


Jamie Partridge - Astrology King

Neptune music

Sunday, June 20, 2021

Solstice/Shabbat Community Tarot Reading

the whole reason I started making it a point to have Shabbat dinner on Friday nights was because it was an important and special family ritual that I grew up with that I wanted to continue with my own child, so he could have that same sense of connection and tradition, and a way to honor our cultural heritage. with him gone, I'm not entirely sure how to bring in Shabbat on my own.  I can light the candles and say those prayers.  I can say the rest of the prayers we say (the same ones my dad said) over the bread & wine, and take my sip, eat my pinch...but I'm not much in the mood for chicken soup, or a meal.

my recent foray into embracing the sabbath has been meditating on, and pulling tarot cards for, a community reading, but my well is empty right now, and I have no overflow with which to serve others at the moment. I thought of either doing a one-card pull for myself, to find a place to focus my energy, or write out a ritual for the Solstice tomorrow.  can I do both?  let's find out...  



...turns out I can't.  again, my well is currently empty, and everything is really hard and taking extra long for me right now.  please be patient with my grieving process, as it interlaces with all the other stress I am/we are navigating during this intense astrological/planetary time.

I set up a lovely Solstice altar with candles, a chalice of water, quartz crystals, garnets, citrine, and amber.  I put on the binaural beats, did my meditation, and pulled my cards.  then I realized I had left 6 of the cards from that particular deck tucked in my tarot journal from the last reading I did.  nice.  so I put the cards away and tried to work on a ritual to share instead, but I was just too tired and foggy to write it all out, so I called it a night.



today, this is my best: 

ritual - take a ritual bath.  circle up outdoors, preferably around a fire pit.  cast a circle, call in the quarters.  honor Sun deities, the Divine Light, Yang energy...the root, sacral, and solar plexus chakras.  sing, play, dance, drum, feast - Have Sex.  gather and direct the energy raised towards a specific purpose.  thank the quarters, open the circle, ground your energy.  blessed be.

    colors - orange, yellow, white, gold

    crystals - sunstone, serpentine, garnet, amber, citrine, carnelian

    flowers - roses, marigolds, sunflowers, seasonal fruits & veggies

    incense - sandalwood, saffron, frankincense, laurel

    activities - make flower crowns, garden, perform sun salutations, charge crystals out in the sun, 

    pick berries, lay in the sunshine



image shows 6 cards from the Tarot of a Moon Garden deck, two garnets, and one citrine, on a pastel cloth with silver stripes.


what is the sun illuminating for us?  Temperance - balance, moderation, harmony...peace, patience.    the sun is shining a light on our inner calm and perspective, the ways we've learned not to get caught up in drama and adapt to the situations in our lives.  being in touch with who we are brings contentment, while taking the time to re-evalute our priorities will bring us an even greater sense of purpose.

what energy are we currently radiating out to the Universe?  The Tower - destruction, upheaval, chaos.  well, that's not a good look...though it could be!  this card is about change in the most profound way.  a Big change, happening Fast.  throw out the old, and start building something new.  this is unavoidable and scary, but usually brings us a truer foundation than what we were standing on before.

what do our souls need us to release to the sun?  6 of Staffs - victory, pride, celebrityall hail the conquering hero, riding through the crowd with their head high, drinking in the cheers...we need to let that go.  perhaps it's not the time to pat ourselves on the back for a job well done?  or just put the brakes on the swelled head that can come with it? 

how can we use the medicine of the sun for our growth?  Ace of Pentacles - prosperity, new beginnings.  this new cycle is suggestive of material things, of a seed that needs to grow in the secure ground of our stability.  nurturing this energy is abundantly rewarding, like watching our dreams become reality, and being ready for the challenge of realizing our potential.

what will manifest from our Solstice intentions over the next 3 months?  6 of Swords - moving on, leaving something behind.  in this card, we see a hardship overcome, and a move towards normalcy returning.  we may not like what had to leave behind to get here, and feel defeated and tired from the challenges we've had to face and overcome, but we are healing, and possibly heading towards a stronger version of ourselves.  we need to think rationally about the best ways to get there.

message from the sun?  Wheel of Fortune - changes, cycles, fate/destiny.  no one can avoid their turns on the wheel.  we must remember to enjoy the good while we have it, because everything can and does change in an instant, then changes again.  while the process can be uncomfortable, that inevitability is the only thing we can rely on - the Universe will maintain it's own balance, and we're mostly just along for the ride.

well that's all pretty intense...but shining a light on our Temperance while we're caught up in Tower energy will certainly bring our consciousness into how we're being the 6 of Staffs, and that Ace of Pentacles brings some hope to the hardships of the 6 of Swords as we all go for another turn on the Wheel of Fortune. the recent eclipses (lunar & solar) with so many planets in retrograde (four!) has been a wild ride, and while we're coming out of it, the astrology speaks to there being even more turmoil on the horizon.  so stay sharp, keep focused, and have your eyes on the prize (whatever that may be for you).


 thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  



Saturday, June 12, 2021

Shabbat Community Tarot Reading #4

wow, what a crazy week it's been for me - how about you?  so much upheaval and emotional drama!  even though we're 'through' the eclipse, we're still feeling its energy, and will be for a few days (weeks, months), and as we all know, the cosmic reverberations just keep circling out forever...  

I'm not sure where to start this week, as the reading I did was very personal, and specific to my circumstances.  I feel like if I'm going to read for the community, I can't pretend to be 'love and light' all the time, and like nothing ever goes wrong in my life because I'm claiming to offer to help people focus on doing their own deep work, so I have to show how I do mine.  


so - let's just say my child needs their community now in the form of a strong support network to help them navigate away from their current situation into something healthier for them in the long run.  the evil rage monster that lives in me has decided it's time for them to be free, rip off the band-aid, they're ready, I've done my job of preparing for this day well.  why postpone the inevitable?  they've embarked on their own underworld journey now, plumbing their own depths...the astrology would blow them away if they cared to look.  it's not my job to tell anymore, it's my job to love and let go, now.  but they don't want to leave, is the thing.  they wants to make demands of me, threaten and lash out.  they want all the benefits I've always provided - few though they may be - and to act indignantly while taking advantage and bringing so much conflict into our daily lives, I've been triggered back to my father throwing the kitchen table at me when I told him I was moving out (with a great deal more resources than my child has at the moment, though his daddy certainly had a lot less).  

the running away started with the tenuous stirrings of what might become first love.  now that there's 'someone else', I've become obsolete overnight, and have been shut out, and shut down.  so the arguments have escalated to where we're both teetering on the edge of violence, neither of us wanting to cross that line, and for years now, I've been sending them outside to deal with those feelings to get them away from me - it's my house, I won't be disrespected - and get them moving to physically help cycle that energy through.  so we argued, I told them to get out, and they demanded a therapist, so I called in mental health.  they called in CPS.  so now I'm under investigation for abuse, exacerbating an already intense housing crisis (impending homelessness), and did I mention my mom died two months ago?  it's fine...I'm sure I deserve all that and more, don't I?  but the bottom line in my opinion is that they've hit their wall - as have I - and it's time to figure out how to get them what they need from the support network they will build with the help of the authorities they've called in.  we can't live like this anymore.  it would have been nice to have the clarity to handle it on our own, but...oh well.

yeah, it's time to get out of their way, and leave them to it.  I caught a bit of a reading a day or two ago (I wish I could remember where!) that spoke to a wisdom coming in from the side, somehow...that it was important to pay attention to snippets that may come from random sources, and that was the kid yesterday - three times in the midst of the chaos they spoke honest truth, though I doubt they recognized the importance of what they said.  and between my own shadow work, Lorelai Kude's talk of overwhelm, and protecting what you've mothered, and Sasha's speaking of needing to let go of something anything, and 'where do we go from here' energy aligning with true direction and drastic change that has been a long time coming...I'm hearing this message loud and clear.  as hard as it is to focus through all the emotional turmoil, miscommunication, power struggles/control issues, change/liberation/chaos cycles, I'm doing my best to simply survive each day, which in the moment mostly looks like me trying to drink enough water, and failing, repeatedly.

so some cards for me.  some wisdom on how to step out of this dance.  help the kid get what they need to move forward and move along.  there's no coming back...things are irrevocably different and damaged now, so it's time to change course, and let life flow on by without me.  for this reading I used my oldest deck,  and this spread Meg @3am.tarot posted for the New Moon & Solar Eclipse in Gemini (June 10).  here's what we got:


image shows an antler, a crystal ball, a small metal goddess figurine, three cards from The Tarot of the Witches tarot deck (The Lovers/The Magician/The Chariot), a quartz crystal, and a garnet on a pastel colored cloth with silver stripes.


reflect onThe Lovers - one rose reaching towards the sun, while a briar entangles the moon.  such a strange card...look at the two of them, dispassionate mannequins entangled in her weird hair, that half dead-or-alive hill they're standing on.  a meaningful relationship...aside from all the love, beauty, harmony, deep feeling, trust, honor, physical attraction, there's the dynamic of sacred vs. profane, and a testing of theories.  an expansion - taking what we've learned, and re-centering from a new vantage point in a spiral progression.  widening the heart.  coming out of isolation into exchange - an act of radical vulnerability; a moment of truth.

revisit & exploreThe Magician - creative Source.  imagination, self-reliance, skill, willpower, curiosity, cleverness, unity in thought and feeling.  deeply connected to, and aware of, the resources surrounding us as well as the magic within them.  an expanding sense of possibility, the first step in a journey - packing The Fool's satchel.  confidence, awake to possibility, throwing open the doors.  expansion, opportunity, courage, tapping into potential.  knowing we are the magic.

seek truth withinThe Chariot - as soon as that expansion happened in the The Lovers card, the fool on their journey recognized their power, and met adversity with resolve and determination.  alert and ready for battle - horses charging forward, his foot on the yoke, he's prepared to balance his mental and physical strength in working towards greatness, as soon as he can get his emotions under control.

there is great significance to me in these cards, considering where my teen is currently holed up, and with cards 6 & 7 - The Lovers and The Chariot - showing up together like that, with only the Magician's spark between them.  there's that pattern of being pushed into things too early, before they're ready, because I'm already holding more than I can safely handle, and something's got to give.  this is my child, born three weeks early.  this is my child sliding down my leg because they won't hold on, they simply trust that 'I've got them'.  this is my child selling off their trains to pay the car insurance that one time.  this is my child's path to freedom - their first steps out on their own.  I'm not going to read their birth chart, or check their horoscope or anything because they didn't ask me to, and I respect people's privacy...but I can see what I see, you know?  all that trauma I tried so hard to avoid passing on, that I made sure to pass on.  our ancestors' hard-won aspirations now crushed beneath my personal failures, and it hurts to live here.


thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  





good vibes binaural beats

Sunday, June 6, 2021

Shabbat Community Tarot Reading #3

bur oak

hello my darlings - I'm enjoying doing these community readings, and I hope you are getting something out of them too.  this week, I didn't feel called to ask any specific questions, I just wanted to clear my mind, shuffle, and see what the cards themselves had to offer.  the deck asking to be utilized for the task was the Celtic Tree Oracle - interesting because they're not really cards I use, but cards I keep because they were a gift from a dear friend, and many years ago, a deck belonging to a different dear friend gave me some profound insights into my life at that time.  while there isn't a Celtic bone in my body (though there could be a past life...), I deeply respect the traditions of others, and love the natural connection these cards invite us into through the trees.  as it happened, I had the opportunity to do this reading outdoors, so I sat down under a bur oak, and enjoyed the scent of wild rose in the air while paying attention to the details in the images.  though there is a particular system which one is supposed to employ for their use, I know these cards well enough to know that they don't mind my freestyling.  so - let's see what wisdom they have to offer us:


image shows three cards from The Celtic Tree Oracle deck on a pastel colored cloth with silver stripes.  on the left we have 'Quert' (apple), in the center 'Muin' (vine), and on the right Ioho (yew).  each card has the corresponding Ogham lettering in the border on each side of the center tree image, a detail below, and intricate knotwork designs all  around.

Quert - Apple:  ah, the apple!  one of the oldest known cultivated fruits, it is associated with choice, possibly between similarly attractive options, though the options may matter less than the fact of a choice needing to be made.  in Arthurian legend, apples are connected to Merlin and Avalon - a secret mystical island where the uninitiated must not eat of the fruit, for it contains the Pythagorean pentagram (the seeds in the shape of a star, possibly symbolizing divine wisdom).  it was both where Excalibur was forged, and where Arthur was laid to rest, and said to come back from someday. I always think of the Greek goddess Eris in connection to apples, and the chaos she instigated with her golden apple for 'the prettiest one' that started the Trojan War, as well as the Garden of the Hesperides where that golden apple was grown.

from "How Merlin Dwelt Among His Druids in a Secret Orchard in Celyddon, in the Emperor Arthur's Time"

      Seven-core and seven most fruitful Appletrees

               E'en since the very dawn of the age, there

      Had made spring murmurous with bright small bees

      Crooning their tune i' the white bloom-laden air:

      And 'neath the flaunting skies of midsummer

   Had swayed green plumy jewel-luminous seas:

 see also Poem:  Avallennau Myrddin (Merlin's Apple Trees) over at Contemplative Inquiry

Muin - Vine:  this card is associated with Lughnassadh/Lammas, the August 1st Celtic beginning-of-harvest-season festival dedicated to the Sun.  grape vines - in the context of wine - speaks to the release of prophetic powers, letting go of logic and intellect, and letting intuition lead.  permitting instinct to show you what needs doing, allowing emotion to flow freely, and openly trusting your senses to act for you.  be open to noticing all the signs and omens.  *at this point in my meditation of the cards I kept noticing a heavenly scent of flowers which I couldn't identify, but oh, it made me look!  on my way out of the park I found the source - these wild roses in the image posted below.  intoxicating!  I used to work at an apple orchard, and one of the many things I learned from old Mr. Soons was that roses are in the same family as apples, as are peaches, pears, plums, strawberries and cherries.  also, there's a theory that the golden apples in the Garden of the Hesperides - the "nymphs of the evening" - may really have been oranges! (signs & omens)

wild roses!


Ioho - Yew:  several of the oldest trees on Earth are yews, and as such, are deeply sacred.  their branches grow down into the ground to form new stems and trunks, and when the old trunk dies, new ones grow from it, giving this tree the meaning of rebirth and reincarnation.  a new soul sprung from ancient roots in a new body.  that the eldest of the oldest yew trees (age estimates vary between 2000 to 9000 years old) stand in churchyards shows they were previously sites of ancient Bardic/Druidic groves; interestingly enough, in 2015, one of these appeared to have changed sex (the ongoing reemergence of goddess energy in the collective consciousness?)!  the longbows the Celts were known for their skill with were carved from yew, and while the needles were historically used to brew poison, it can be used homeopathically as well.  this card is direct contact with your past, spiritual strength renewed, a revivification - understanding through wisdom that was always there, which we may have forgotten, or ignored.  things that were, are, always will be ~ 

Ioho (Yew) card detail with intricate boarder knotwork, Ogham letter, center image of tree, and inset detail of trunk, needles, and berries, in muted colors.

look for an upcoming choice, which when paying attention to signs omens, calls for the possibility of a new life growing from the old one.  dive deep into the well of your own understanding, and trust what you find there!

thank you for coming along, commenting, and sharing - this reading is for anyone who wants/needs it!  as always, I hope there's something in here for you, personally, and feel free to contact me for a private reading.  



Avellenau (Appletrees) The Black Book of Carmarthen, XVII

The Theosophical Path, Volume 15 edited by Katherine Augusta Westcott Tingley 

 Mythology and Folklore of Yew from Trees For Life

 The Darkness of the Yew from The Hazel Tree