holy cow...

Wow, I had a whole post typed in recapping the last few things I've been meaning to recap, when I stepped away from the computer to live my life for a minute, and the power went out...you would have thought it would still be here, as it was saved and all.  Guess not.

So.  Dreams.  And dream interpretation.  For the dream I called 'the first one' in this post:  in a space where I feel comfortably trapped, I have the freedom to explore the symbolic boundary between personal self and public self while merging various aspects of my personality, and letting things happen at their own pace - anticipatory, perhaps uneasy.  I'm looking to recapture the excitement, freedom and vitality of youth in my current need for intimacy and affection, but I'm keeping a secret, not dealing with an issue, getting ready to finally acknowledge qualities within myself.  I feel emotionally cold and frigid, excluded, left out, scarred by the lack of love and absence of warmth in my own family circle, so I need to work on mindfully exploring aspects of my self that have yet to be acknowledged or utilized.

The second one, from the same post:  an aspect of my personality that I have rejected, but am ready to incorporate and acknowledge, and the relationships I have with those around me are important in learning about myself.  a positive regression into a past where I had no responsibilities, things were simpler, carefree. escaping the pressures and stresses of adulthood, acting in a childish manner - because 'acting like an adult' is a part of myself that is repressed and hidden. so the archetypal dream helper offers me insight and advice in searching for some direction in my life which is lacking motivation.  a transformative self exploration is the beginning of the path that I am taking, going through a transitional phase and journeying into the unknown to experience spiritual enlightenment, emotional growth, physical prowess, new opportunities and mental passages.  social and cultural changes, expanding knowledge and awareness - now is a good time to experiment and try new things. In considering personal experiences and memories, they may be a reflection of my current surroundings. achieving my goals through perseverance and hard work.  a period of stress struggle determination ambition.  instability  - lost my grip on a situation, a relationship.  lost control of perception, vitality, my outlook on life, my consciousness and point of view. intuition and awareness in reflecting on a decision.  going back out into the larger world and experiencing life again. a new surge of energy, growth, ambition and renewed confidence.  rebuilding by working on bettering my mind and body.  approaching my goals with careful forethought and preparation, yet lowering my standards, doing less than my best.  willpower, hidden aspects of my activities, feeling hollow and empty. an awakening to get out and expose myself to new interests and activities.  feeling stuck - dug into a hole and can't get out to enjoy something familiar.  spending more time cultivating and developing some emerging ability I thought was left in the past that is coming back to me, bringing me back to a particular time period, as a situation in my waking life may be parallel to a situation from my past and my dream is providing a means of resolving how I've lost my direction and lost sight of my goals. I feel worried and insecure about the path I am taking and I am trying to reach out for support - looking for someone to lean on while still adjusting to a new situation in which the rules and conditions are ever changing. coming into contact with some aspect of my psyche or unconscious and recognizing a part of myself that was previously repressed or undeveloped.  change - identifying new facets of a relationship, taking it to a new level / in a new direction.  feeling helpless, dependant on others.  take charge of the situation.

Well, there's just about nothing there that doesn't  pertain to the situations going on in and around my life these days, so I actually found that exercise to be very centering, and even in a way reassuring.  It actually took some research and a bit of thought, which is why it took so much time to get to, but I'm glad I did.

♥